English, Poetry

Worship

yellow glow
top of the hill

oil puddles mirrored
in the night service window

mints, milk and toilet door
condoms, vanilla
vodka, air fresheners
through the night service window

the first moist strands of excitement
rolled up in paper petals, a light

you’re not supposed to on the forecourt
says the night service window

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English, Poetry

Yield

Then sometimes you think of Pearl Jam,
A forgotten teenage treasure, the whining 
and wailing in tune with young angst.

On the school bus,
The rhythm and hum of Yield, as we
Stop 

Near a sign at the side of the road,
the metalheads kicking
a rucksack down the hill,

a small girl with taped-together spectacles and holographic boots weeping,
gathering her smelling pens in the bushes,
learning to yield.

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English, Essays

Waiting to Ex-Hale: tracing female emancipation across English literary history

Female protagonists feature prominently in English literature, not only in works written by women. Their depiction reflects the state of female autonomy at the time the piece of fiction was written; works can help trace the development of emancipation from social conventions limiting women’s freedom to act according to their needs and feelings. A close look at works from the mid-19th century till the early 2000s is particularly revealing.

         Margaret Hale, protagonist of Elizabeth Gaskell’s state of England novel North and South (published around 1850) is still very much restricted by norms of female behaviour, which she accepts.
The novel tells about her falling in love with John Thornton, a mill-owner in Milton-Northern, after having rejected his proposal at first. When he sees her with her brother, who is in danger of being executed for mutiny, at the station in the late evening, Thornton assumes that she has a lover. as a magistrate, he finds out that she has lied to a policeman who leads the investigation into a possible manslaughter which has happened at the same time and place; in order to protect her brother, Margaret denies having been there. When she finds out that he knows of her lie and therefore thinks badly of her, she cannot explain the matter to him, even though Thornton can be trusted not to tell on her brother.

         Female readers today might get excited about her strategy of waiting for everything to fall into place; some might even get angry at her passiveness; but Margaret Hale is bound by a set of rules which forbid her to write personal letters to a man or even to visit him because she is unmarried. She never questions these rules, and they are never explicitly stated; nevertheless, the reader experiences them in the difference of Margaret’s behaviour as compared with that of many women today, who would just make the first step into a love relationship.

         Soon, however, women started breaking the rules, if in danger of being driven out of respectable society. By the end of the 19th century, the ‘new woman’ emerged. One woman risking her reputation and respectability because she dares to develop into such a ‘new woman’ is Lady Windermere, protagonist of Oscar Wilde’s Lady Windermere’s Fan. Suspecting her husband to be unfaithful to her, she decides to take the offer of a family friend, who is in love with her, to run away together. When she visits him after a party, she forgets her fan in his room. Her good name can only be saved by her mother, who, already expelled from fashionable society for being divorced, claims the fan to be hers. Lady Windermere has taken the risk which lies in breaking the rules because she was unhappy, but in the end she returns into her circle of friends, changed, but not disrespected.

         In fictional works of the early Naughties, many female protagonists face the question if conventions of behaviour are still relevant to them; in general, they only break the rules if they have decided that this is not the case.

Helen Reed, protagonist of David Lodge’s Thinks (published in 2001), for instance, is faced with a very attractive adulterous man, Ralph Messenger. As a widow of Catholic backgrounds and strong moral principles she fights her lust when he offers her an affair. But she is only successful in this fight until she finds out that her deceased husband has had uncountable affairs and that Ralph’s wife is infidel, too. Seeing that social norms she has always adhered to are disregarded by everybody else, she starts an affair with Messenger. If this behaviour can be generalized, women today do not so much respond to what respectable society expects of them but rather to their own set of rules, which may be dropped in case it is not shared by others.

         The question remains whether this development has gone far enough. It’s easy to see that the range of possible behaviour of women has grown – it would be quite unthinkable for Margaret Hale to commit adultery and not lose her social status. Wilde’s and Lodge’s protagonists are not entirely free of moral restraints, however. Lady Windermere wants her escapade to remain secret, although all that could be read from her fan is that she has been in another man’s room; and Helen Reed, when unpleasant events take place towards the end of the novel, feels punished for her disobedience to conventions.

A further and necessary step in the emancipation of women and female protagonists will be to free themselves from the importance of their rules being shared by others. Only when women are strong enough to uphold a moral code independent of public opinion will true emancipation from mere conventions be achieved.

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English, Essays

“Rasen betreten verboten!” – Two British perspectives of Germany around World War I

Before the World Wars, Britain used to be a kingdom on which the sun never set. No other European country had as much power and was as rich. Germany, for example, had comparably few and meaningless colonies and united its limited power and wealth only late in the 19th century.

From that very moment in 1871, however, the British public developed a latent sense of danger. People were afraid that ze Germans might cross the Channel and steal their beloved Empire. Although this fear is hardly stated explicitly, it is mirrored in works especially of the beginning of the 20th century, both before and after World War I.

H.M. Munroe, better known as Saki, wrote When William Came shortly before he had to serve in the war. The short novel deals with Kaiser Wilhelm taking away what Saki, a dandy after the fashion of Oscar Wilde, cherished most about Britain: London. Although an omniscient narrator tells the story of a soldier returning home from service in the colonies just after the Germans have taken over, neither do the colonies play a big role in his thoughts nor is the novel melodramatic or pathetic. Rather, it is quite funny; all the street signs have been translated; strange continental fashions like expression-dancing as an art form have been introduced; visitors are forbidden to walk on the lawn in public parks; and all of London society is reigned by a sort of military etiquette.

         It is, therefore, quite obvious that the changes observed by the homecoming soldier are based on clichés of his German contemporaries. Germans cherish their language, they are deeply feeling, earnest and find it important to express their true sentiments; they are very orderly and let regulations limit the quality of their lives; and their society is dominated by the military caste like no other civilized country’s.

         And civilized they are. Many governesses in British fiction are German. Some are ridiculed, but on the whole, they are presented as harmless.

Not so in Virginia Woolf’s novel, Mrs Dalloway, written just after the war. The only German character, governess Ms Kilman represents her country in a not very heart-warming way. She is severe, strict, dislikes colourful clothes, hardly ever smiles, and secretly always complains about her unhappy state. In addition, she emphasizes religiousness, and loneliness has left an imprint on her character in the form of a touch of cruelty.

         The story again takes place in London. Elizabeth Dalloway, daughter of protagonist Clarissa Dalloway and Ms Kilman’s pupil, is regarded as the most beautiful lady in London society by all characters in the Dalloways’ house. Even Ms Kilman loves her, with apparently more than pedagogic eros. Clarissa Dalloway, who hates the governess, is deeply jealous and constantly afraid that Ms Kilman could take away what she loves the most: her daughter. To complete the very unfavourable picture of Germany, the name – ‘Ms Kill-man’ – is a reflection of the numerous men killed in World War I, begun by the Germans.

         Both in When William Came and in Mrs Dalloway, Germans occupy and take for themselves an object which embodies the power and wealth of the Empire. London as its capital is just a synonym for the Empire; Elizabeth Dalloway is the only daughter of a rich family, her father is an MP, and every good name comes to her mother’s parties.

         World War I, however, changed the perception of the Germans. Before the war, Saki thought them to be powerful enough to invade Britain and change its culture. After the war, Germany has only a powerless, female representative who evokes both pity and disdain in the reader. Jealousy and the fear of being robbed still play a role in the mind of the British subject, but on a different, more personal level. Germany has been defeated in the war. It has not become harmless, for the fear prevails; but for the moment, it is unable to attack. All it can do is pray, learn, complain and stay away from colourful robes.

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English, Poetry

Terms of Service: on a general Condition.

If you do not pay off the full amour outstanding;
If you make only the minimum paybacks each month;
If you lose your balance in full and on time:

For agreements made before 23 March 2011,
even if before the monthly duel date —
Unless you have a specific interest in the subject:

If you wear the minimum armour due 
and the breeches just for the duel date;
If a change is made to your state of grace:

If new insects are made or bees are unfurred;
If you are masked for this illustration either verbally, in writing or via email;
If you use it online, unless you have a special interest in loud men —

If your details are obtained and used without a console table;
If making a garment from a tank or building variety that supports ghastly laymen
(Of little interest, unless for military)

If there is a transcendence you do not recognise;
If you find that your existing credulity limit is insufficient for your needs;
If you are not happy with the way in which we handled your complacency:

You must take up your problem with us fist.
No man will work for your interests unless they’re his.

based on the First Direct Credit Card Terms & Conditions published in 2010

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English, Poetry

Two tracks in a cornfield

most certainly from a tractor
or some other agriculture machine.

But could they not be
a roller-skater’s, skating with feet wide apart
or two cyclists riding down the hill side by side
or a man and his dog, a girl with a doll’s pram,
the hare and the hedgehog leaving a trace of their race

or just you and me, coming out of the forest
into the open fields after the harvest,
picking up leftover husks of grain

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English, Poetry

Revealed: 18 questions that will help me find my life’s purpose, according to the internet

(a 2-minute read)

Closet, water closet — how are they related?
Why are all perfectly organised wardrobes monochrome?
What’s an easy way to make pinch pleat curtains?

How normal are my opinions on the chocolate that comes in chocolate boxes?
How to clean a litter box and keep it odour free?
How do I speed up the decluttering process?

How to know if I’m paranoid?
What is bitcoin and how do I buy it?
How to make slime?

Where am I right now?
What Manhattan neighbourhood is right for me based on my taste in food?
Why should I be extra nice to a new Mum?

Would I rather skip dinner or dessert?
Why are people who shower at night the right ones?
What historical event happened on my birthday?

What TV show ending annoyed the hell out of me?
Can I name the Jake Gyllenhall movie from just one screenshot?
Am I actually creative?

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